Inner Darkness: Omake
by Dr Ninja Monkey
Summary: Funny what-if scenes from Inner Darkness
1. Burials Are Hard

**A/N: This story will be a series of shorts from each chapter of Inner Darkness. These are going to be humorous and out of character most of time (which is why it never made it into the main story.) I don't own the rights to any of these characters, they are all riots champions. However! Their antics! That is mine!**

**Alternative scene for Syndra trying to bury her elder. Who knew the temple was built on a dormant volcano?**

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_I suppose I should at least bury him_, she thought. Syndra used her magic to pick up his body and carry him outside a decent ways into the forest before she found someplace she thought befitting of a burial. It wasn't much but the area was open around where the grave would be, the scenery, flowers, and tree's nearby had a calming effect. Syndra used her magic to blow open a section of the ground to create the grave.

As Syndra was about to put her master in the grave she heard the ground below her rumble. Syndra jumped back into the air as a plume of lava shot out of the grave.

"What the fuck!" Syndra shouted in shock.

_Well that isn't….normal…. _Syndra thought to herself.

During her monologue, the lava was slowly creeping out setting the surrounding scenery on fire.

Upon seeing the forest catching on fire Syndra started to panic. In a desperate attempt to stop the lava flow, Syndra used her magic to pick up a nearby boulder and slammed it into the grave.

Syndra started dancing in the air, with a satisfied smile at her accomplishment. As she continued to dance she didn't notice that the rock was slowly melting, and the lava was continuing to flow across the ground. Syndra turned around one last time to gaze upon her accomplishment, only to discover that the rock had melted and there was twice as much lava as before.

_NO NO NO NO, shit lava how do you deal with…lava is pretty much just glorified fire, and you use water to deal with fire. _Syndra thought as she quickly reminisced on a time when she nearly burnt down the temple in an attempt to bake cookies.

Syndra flew down to a lake in front of the temple and used her magic to pick up gallons upon gallons of water. She unceremoniously threw the water at the lava, and upon impact the lava steamed as it rapidly cooled.

As Syndra gazed upon the landscape, half burned to a crisp and half swamped in water, Syndra contemplated _Wait, where is master's body?!_


	2. What Ninja's Do In Their Spare Time

"If Zed wants to tell me something, why doesn't he just come and tell me in person?" Syndra asked the dangling shadow ninja. Said ninja didn't respond but merely reached into his uniform with a shaky hand and pulled out a piece of paper that they then handed to Syndra.

Syndra rolled her eyes as she accepted the note, "What does a girl have to do to get a decent conversation around here, you ninjas never say anything when you visit."

Syndra opened the note and read:

_Syndra,_

_I have an emergency! I am out of_

_Sugar for my cookies! Please attach_

_to ninja before throwing._

_xoxo,_

_Zed_

Syndra face palmed after reading Zeds note, the ninja then slowly pulled out a measuring cup. She took a pitchers stance, pulled her arm back and with her magic sent the ninja flying all the way back to the Order of Shadows.

Zed sat in the kitchen with his _Sinful Succulence_ apron on, tapping his fingers against the table impatiently waiting for the ninja's return. He was rewarded a few seconds later when the ninja came flying through the roof and landed directly at his feet.

"So did you get the sugar!?" Zed asked excitedly

A few seconds later the ninja shakily raised up a cup full of sugar.

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**A/N: Obviously the way that the ninja got the sugar was when Syndra wound up her throw, the ninja was pulled back into Syndra's kitchen. As he was in there he scrounged up as much sugar before being rocketed back to the Order of Shadows.**

**For those wondering what Sinful Succulence is, it is the bakery that Morgana owned before being shut down for..._reasons_... Some say she is still wandering the lands with a food cart baking her gloriously burnt cookies for all the naughty children in Runeterra.**


	3. Arvile's Lesson in Gemology

**A/N: While attempting to win over Irelia, Arvile meets an unexpected champion from the league. AKA Arvile is bad at listening to directions.**

**This chapter was written pretty much entirely by Midnightfluff, so all credit goes to her for this chapter. I CAN'T DO PICK UP LINES**

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Confidence renewed Arvile got up and headed towards the rooms. He knocked on the last room to the left, but was only met with silence. After realizing he wasn't going to receive an answer, he decided that he would try to woo his way into the room.

"I feel that you were acting shy out there. How about instead you and I meet up at dawn to practice 'tactical' maneuvers"

Again, he was met with silence.

"I have an inkling that your sword would look amazing in the morning sun."

At this statement, the occupant of the room muttered "sword?"

"Yes, I really love the way it glistens like a diamond."

Suddenly the door slams open, but instead of finding Irelia he is met with a man whose armor glowed like gems and his hair was draped elegantly upon his shoulders.

After seeing the figure in front of him, he stammered "Y-y-you're n-n-not Irelia!?"

The man replied, "And you know nothing of gems!" Enraged by this plebeian's lack of gem knowledge, he dragged Arvile into the room.

Iroh was finishing up his shower when he heard a boom that suspiciously sounded like his wall was breaking. Stepping out of the bathroom, he noticed that he has a new wall decoration.

"So lad, this is where you've been the last few hours. What have you been up to all this time?"

Still dazed from being thrown through a solid wood wall, he mutters, "A sapphire is a ruby."

On the other side of the wall, Iroh heard a man shout, "It's the other way around! Have you learned nothing from our time together!?"

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**A/N: Why was the leagues most fabulous resident in the inn? He may have heard about a cache of gems in Ionia's mountains, maybe he had a hot date? Possibly both, the world may never know...**


	4. Camping with a Noxian

**A/N: This chapter is a little shorter due to the length of the coinciding Inner Darkness chapter.**

**Remember to leave a review for me so I can improve!**

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The Noxian warrior's thoughts were interrupted when she saw a campfire shoot up in the distance.

A campfire? Fuck, there is a mercenary camp right by there!

She wasted no time jumping down from the tree and rushing out of town towards source of the light, fearing for the worst.

The warrior grew worried as she drew closer to the camp and hear the sound of clashing metal.

As she ran into the camp she was met with the confused faces of some merchants.

"You weren't attacked were you?" The warrior asked, slightly confused.

The merchants all shook their heads side to side.

"I thought I heard the sound of metal clashing, what was it?"

The warriors' question was answered when a child dropped a bag of pots and pans that he had been carrying down in front of their campfire.

"You…weren't sent by Karma were you?"

The merchants looked back and forth at each other before shaking their heads no once again.

The warrior once again heard the clanging of pots and pots, she apologized to the merchants whose night she had interrupted before running off again. The rest of her night was spent running from campsite to campsite investigating the mysterious metal noises.


	5. The Shadow Baker

**A/N: I feel kind of bad for portraying Zed as more evil in the Omake than my actual story, but it was totally worth it for that ending.**

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Zed walked into the interrogation room, admiring the cold, dank, and lifeless walls.

"Did you get any useful information out of the prisoner?"

"Tons, sir!" The ninja responded.

"Good, tell me what you got!"

The ninja shifted uncomfortably, "It'd be easier to show you, than tell you." After saying this he ran out of the room and all Zed heard was the shuffling of papers.

_Did he get a map? I'll have to give him a nice reward if he did._ Zed thought to himself, pleased.

The ninja ran back into the room with a few rolls of paper and plopped them on the table. After searching through the papers he organized them into a neat stack and handed them to Zed.

_Hmm….? This clearly isn't a map, directions or information about their military operations._

As Zed read over the papers, he found out that they had nothing to do with the Kinkou order.

"WHAT IS THIS? This isn't details about the Kinkou order. This is some old man's recipe book!" Zed yelled as he flung the papers at the ninja.

"You have been torturing this guy for days and this is all you have come up with!"

"Y-yes" The ninja stammered

"This is a waste of my time," Zed said menacingly as he readied one of his steel claws.

Zed used one of his steel claws to pick up one of the papers on the ground and wagged it in his subordinates face, "and I don't like it when people waste my time."

As he was wagging the paper around, he recognized the papers heading.

"Wait…." Zed asked, all venom draining from his voice, "Is that a Flambé recipe?"

"Y-yes, sir. The man was a master baker, and these are all of his recipes. It took us days to write all of these down sir!"

Zed lunged towards the ninja, and embraced him a giant loving bear hug, "YOU ARE THE GREATEST SUBORDINATE AN EVIL SHADOW MASTER COULD EVER ASK FOR!"


	6. Sarcasm as a Coping Mechanism

**A/N: So chapter 6 wasn't a very happy chapter. There wasn't anything that I could make fun of in it while still being in good taste. Instead I give you another Omake from chapter 5.**

**I really like Zed as a baker...I may have a problem.**

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**_Keep telling yourself that. Have fun playing dress up!" _**Zed's shadow retorted cheerfully, before giving a sarcastic wave and disappearing.

Zed sighed, _I hate that guy…_

**_"_****_I heard that!"_**

Zed gave an audible sigh.

At this another subordinate walked into the room and asked, "So Master. Why is your shadow so sarcastic all the time?"

"Jealousy, my dear boy, Jealousy."

"Forgive my ignorance, but what could he possibly be jealous of?" The subordinate questioned.

"He doesn't have a real body, thus he cannot taste the deliciousness of my baking. Also he cannot bake for himself."

"Sir, not to question you, but why would your shadow care about baked goods?"

"Two reasons, one while he cannot touch or taste, he can still smell. So he's forced to smell the deliciousness that he can never taste. He can see them, but alas he will never be able to hold them. The other reason is that he thinks that with my skills as a Master Baker, my skills go to waste by not using them to try and take over the world."

"I always did wonder why you never used your cookies for evil."

"Whoever heard of evil cookies?" Zed retorted.

Zed continued, "Besides, even someone as evil as me still thinks that everyone should be able to enjoy the glory that is chocolate!"

Zed walked into the room, finding his shadow pacing around a table that had a tray of his cookies on it.

"What are you doing?" Zed questioned.

**_"_****_Come to the shadow side Zed, WE HAVE COOKIES!"_**

"I know, I made them. I'll join you though."

**_"_****_Really?"_**

"Yep, I just have one condition."

**_"_****_What's that?"_**

"I want you to…" Zed paused for dramatic effect.

**_"_****_Want me to what!"_** Zed's shadow yelled, getting impatient with Zed's games.

"Pass me…a cookie"

Zed could feel the shadow's glare boring through him at his last statement. Zed couldn't help but smirk to himself underneath his mask.

**_"_****_I HATE YOU, YOU WILL RUE THE DAY YOU TURNED DOWN MY OFFER. I WILL MAKE YOU PAY, MARK MY WORDS!"_**

"Now now, how about I take you to the kitchen and show you how I make these bad boys."

**_"_****_I will enjoy the day that I take over your body and rule the world."_**

"In your dreams creampuff."

**_"_****_Why do you always have to have the last word?!"_**

"Because."


	7. Riven's Punishment

**A/N: I find it ironic that the main story is about Irelia and Syndra, yet in the Omake I tend to write entirely about Zed. Occasionally****like in this chapter I throw in Riven! I probably will start to write more about Irelia and Syndra after the Harrowing when they actually started to get together.**

**Also sorry if the title is misleading!**

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"I hate you, this is revenge because I accidentally knocked all of your bubble bath down the drain isn't it?" Riven said as she walked into the living room in her costume for The Harrowing. She didn't even know why she bothered to put it on.

"Aww come on, it isn't that bad. Besides the bunny tail and ears looks adorable on you! And you look sexy in those red heels." Irelia replied, seemingly ignoring the second part of Riven's statement.

"I knew it, besides those aren't the problem! Well maybe the heels, but this" Riven exclaimed as she motioned to the leather suit and stockings that she was wearing, "is the problem! I feel like I'm going to fall out of this top at any moment!"

"You will be fine, people dress up in worse all the time and they don't have any issues."

"THEY are used to it probably! I'm a soldier, not some sort of skimpy waitress for some old guys at a bar! While I'm at it, where did you even find a giant carrot sword?" As Riven said this, she pointed towards the carrot sword in the corner of the room.

Irelia walked up behind Riven preparing to lead her out of the house towards The Harrowing.

"Don't worry about it, besides you will get used to it in time. You were the one who declined the outfits that I borrowed from Karma's wardrobe."

"From whose!" Riven stiffened at the mention of Karma's name

"Don't worry about!" Irelia replied as she patted her on the shoulder as they left the house.

Riven sighed to herself, _mental note: Don't piss Irelia off… or break her stuff._


	8. Syndra's Imagination

**A/N: Sorry for the late upload, the actual chapter 8 took a long time to write so by the time I was finished with the Omake it was midnight and I wanted it edited before I uploaded it.**

**Anyway, I hope that you enjoy, this one takes place right before the fight with the mercenaries in Chapter 8. This is what was going through Syndra's mind when Irelia told her about poros. Originally this chapter was going to be Syndra and Irelia going to various different places in search of the different kinds of poros, buuuuttttttt just the Freljord was nearly 650 words so the other locations will be saved for another chapter.**

**As always, make sure to read and leave a review! Let me know what I am doing right, wrong, how you like it, etc.**

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Irelia closed her eyes and raised one arm up and put the other across her chest, as she prepared to teach Syndra about poros. "Well poros are known to be very adaptable to a variety of harsh climates. They have been found in the Shadow Isles, volcanoes, and various other places! Though if you ask me, the poros from the Freljord are the cutest."

_Found in a variety of places you say…_ Syndra thought

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In Syndra's mind

Syndra and Irelia were hiking up a snowy mountain in the Freljord. The air was freezing, and every few seconds Syndra would be pelted in the face by the snow that obscured her vision. Though the trek was difficult, they were not about to give up. They were on a mission to find an area in the mountains that was home to a colony of poros, the cutest creature that Syndra had ever laid her eyes on. They had been hiking for days, Syndra didn't have any proof but she could feel that they were close to the colony.

_Just one more peak_. Syndra thought to herself, she had a feeling that a clue was just over top of this mountain peak. The snow storm was getting worse, she had to clean the snow off of her goggles much more frequently. Luckily her purple snow gear wasn't letting any of the cold in yet, so she was still fairly warm.

"We are almost there!" Irelia shouted, Syndra barely heard her voice over the howling of the wind.

Syndra nodded her head, if they were able to find the poros, then all of the hardships that they had faced on this journey would be worth it.

It was about half an hour before they reached what they thought was the top of the mountain. Upon reaching the top, they discovered that it wasn't a mountain peak, but rather that it looked like a giant crater or bowl. As they entered the crater, the howling of the wind disappeared and they could talk normally again.

"You think there are any poros around here?" Syndra asked.

Irelia hesitated before responding, "I'm not sure…It is hard to tell since their fur mirrors the snow."

As they got down lower into the crater Syndra noticed something, "Hey Irelia, does it look like that snow is moving to you?" As she said this she pointed her finger off into the distance.

Syndra noticed Irelia lean forward, trying to get a better view what was up ahead, "I think so, take a look with my binoculars." Irelia pulled her binoculars out of a pouch in the side of her backpack and handed them to Syndra.

Syndra took her goggles off and looked through the binoculars, it took her a minute to find the spot that she was looking at earlier.

"Do you see anything Syndra?"

"Nothing yet, oh wait! SQUUEEEE! I see them playing in the distance, they are so cute!"

Syndra tossed Irelia her binoculars back as she bolted off towards the poros playing in the snow. After a minute of running Syndra was passed by Irelia, who had put some sheathes over her blades earlier and had effectively turned it into a snowboard.

"No fair!" Syndra cried.

"Says the one who can fly!" Irelia yelled back at her.

Syndra stopped for a few seconds, _Oh right, duh._

Syndra lifted herself into the air and flew past Irelia, who merely gave her a warm smile. Then Syndra dove into the snow near the playing poros. She grabbed the nearest poro and started petting it as much and as quickly as she could. After seeing this the other poros ran over to her wanting to get petted as well, and showering her with love.

Back to reality

_Yeah…That's exactly how it would happen. _Syndra thought to herself.


	9. Welcome to the Family

"Okay! So how are we getting to the dungeon? It's not like Zed would just appear out of nowhere and we could use one of his shadow portals." Syndra questioned.

On that note, a shadow portal actually opened up. Zed walked out shirtless, wearing a chef's hat, his mask, an apron, white pants, and mittens while holding cookies.

"How about a thousand poros!" Syndra waited a few seconds, "A poro? Just one? No? I used up my one wish on him?"

"I don't think it was a wish, I think it was a weird coincidence." Riven comforted.

Zed looked around confused, "Whoops, wrong portal. This is awkward…"

Irelia looked at Zed, then back to Syndra, "This is the Master of Shadows? Not quite what I expected," Irelia closed her eyes as she smelled the aroma of cookies that began filling the air. "But dang do those smell good!"

"Don't they! Do you want to try some!?" Zed cleared his throat, "I mean, if you want you can have some."

"Sure!" With that Irelia grabbed a cookie, savoring the macadamia's flavor, then a more serious expression took over her face. "They are good, but I think you either forgot to add almond extract, or at least not enough."

Zed glared at Irelia for a second, then a look of understand appeared in his eyes, "I think you're right! I thought something was off. It was driving me crazy!" Zed then took a knee in front of Irelia, "I thank you, you have saved me hours of imperfect cookies." Zed got up and looked at Syndra, "I approve of your new girlfriend!" And gave her a thumbs up.

"Wait, what?" Irelia questioned, confused.

"Working on it Zed!" Syndra yelled at Zed.

Zed appeared confused, "What? I'm just saying what no one else is willing to say."

After that Zed turned back to Irelia, "May I ask where you learned how cook? No…non-baker could pick out a missing ingredient like that."

"Um…my father was a master swordsmen, but he thought it was important to have a diverse background. So he made my brother and I learn to cook, he thought that mixing the ingredients quickly would increase our dexterity, and it taught us patience. Personally I think he just wanted us to cook dinner for him so he could focus on baking."

Zed nodded in approval, "Your father sounds like a great man." After that Zed turned back to Syndra, "You better not mess this up! I demand that she become my sister-in-law!"

Riven chimed in, "Are you two even related?"

"Officially? No, but with how we act towards one another we might as well be. If I try to deny it any further I might as well be in Shurima. Right now Irelia's the only good thing about me being her brother."

Off to the side Syndra mumbled to herself, "Now I have to deal with two bakers…"

Riven consoled Syndra, patting her on the back, "At least now Zed can go to Irelia instead of you with his baking problems, and you don't have to worry about cooking anymore!"

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**A/N: Get it? Because Shurima is basically Egypt?**

**Also ever since Midnightfluff made me think of Zed as a baker, I have slowly been imaging what a Baker Zed skin would look like. This is what I have come up with so far, except he would have cookies instead of Shurikens on his back and his wrist blades would be replaced with a spatula and a whisk. Also whenever he uses his E, cookie dough flies out around him instead of shadows. Baker Zed, Riot Please.**

**Usually family approval is an issue for after you start dating someone, but Irelia already has it before hand. Heck Zed is probably plotting ways for them to get together in the background, just so he can have someone else to talk about baking with. No offense to Zed's ninjas but they aren't quite at the skill level yet of baking where he can have a deep conversation about baking with them. Besides he has to retain his master status, so he wouldn't dare ask them for advice. Also Zed likes Irelia so someone else can make sure Syndra doesn't blow up too much of the world in her free time. **


	10. Zed gives Syndra a Knife

**A/N: Alternate to the flashback that Zed had in the original story. This is when Zed was still yet a young chef learning the ropes, he was capable but not the master baker he is today! Maybe this is why Zed moved away from normal foods and into baking?**

**As always make sure to leave a review about anything! I feel like I should just rename this series into the adventures of baker Zed...**

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Zed looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was the color of onyx with a hint of gray. While he wasn't nearly old enough for his hair to gray naturally, at 28, the stress from his job brought on the premature graying. His eyes were a deep red, and had scars covering a good portion of his body across his muscles. He had just gotten out of the shower, and for some reason had decided to look at himself in the mirror. With only a towel covering a small portion of his body, all his scars were in plain sight, staring back at him. Each one held a different story, he traced a scar that lined his cheek, he wasn't sure why but for some reason this caught his attention as memories flooded into his mind of that night years ago.

"Alright Syndra, I 'm going to teach you how to cook so I don't have to keep giving you food."

Syndra nodded her head, an innocent smile on her face.

"First we are going to cut up some vegetables: so take the knife in your hand, use your other to hold the vegetable, but make sure that you don't put your fingers forward, you want them hiding behind your knuckles so you don't cut your fingers."


	11. Shadow Gets No Love

**A/N: Sorry about the week late post! Totally didn't realize that I forgot to upload a chapter for the Omake.**

**As always remember to leave me a review! Not sure how but Zed is getting so many different personality types as this goes...I feel like I should just rename this story to the adventures of Baker Zed and friends.**

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**Chapter 11**

Riven looked around, her head pounding, unsure where she was. The area around her was dark, the only light sources that she could see were some faint torches.

"Hello? Is anyone there?" Riven called out to the darkness.

When no one answered she started to explore, after stumbling around for a few minutes she found a hallway. It appeared to be made out a dark wood, much like the room that she woke up in. She walked through twists and turns for a few minutes, exploring a few rooms on her way, hoping to find an exit or clue as to where she was. Eventually she came to an open room that had a throne that was centered in the back of the room. Sitting atop the throne was a figure obscured by the darkness, the figures clothing made it appear as if they devoid of any color except for some grays.

"_**Ah, the sleeping beauty is awake. I've been expecting you." **_The figure commented.

Before Riven could respond, a door off to the right side opened and a masked shirtless man with an apron on walked into the room with mittens on his hands holding a tray of cookies.

"Hey shadow I finished up my latest batch of cookies that you can't eat!"

"Wait? I recognize that voice." Riven walked over to where the man was standing and examined him closely for a second, before walking and squeezing both of his arms several times, for good measure. "And I recognize these biceps...Zed! What are you doing in my dream?"

"Um…I actually don't know. This is a dream? I just came in here to rub my glorious baking in my shadows mask."

"Oooh, cookies!" Before Zed could react Riven snatched and ate one of cookies. "These are pretty delicious cookies you have here Zed."

"I'm…actually not sure if I should be pissed off or happy right now." Zed responded.

"You can always make more!" Riven responded, putting her arm around Zed's shoulder. "Now I have a question for you Zed."

"You…are touching me…" Zed replied.

"See I have a pretty sweet gig going on in Ionia right now. It isn't permanent, I know bummer, but hear me out."

"Why are you still touching me…?"

"How about I go out and make our money fighting bad guys and stuff, don't worry about the details, and all you have to do is bake me cookies and keep up these bad boys." Riven squeezed Zed's biceps after she finished.


	12. Go to Sleep Irelia!

**A/N: This one is on time! Sort of! The inspiration for this chapter totally wasn't a picture of a cat with paper clips stacked on top of his sleeping body, nope totally not.**

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Irelia woke up, feeling surprisingly well considering how little sleep she got. When she sat herself up and looked around her room she noticed someone floating next to her bed.

_Who the heck is that? _Irelia thought to herself, before her memories from the night returned to her. _Oh, right Syndra. Why is she floating?_

Irelia got up, and walked over towards where Syndra was floating and waved a hand underneath her and over top of her, double checking with herself that she was actually floating. A few seconds later an idea came into her head. She went over to her closet and grabbed a few small items, and carefully started to place them on top of Syndra. Once she ran out of items to place on Syndra, she made her way over to Riven's room.

"Riven!" She whispered.

After a few seconds she heard a groan followed by the sound of footsteps. Then the door opened up to show an exhausted Riven, "What? Why are you up so early?"

"I need your help, grab some random Knick knacks and come to my room." Irelia whispered.

"Why?" Riven questioned.

"It is easier to show you then explain, just do it okay?"

With that Irelia made her way downstairs and started gathering up some items, and a few minutes later quietly went back upstairs and found a confused Riven in her room.

"What…am I staring at?" Riven asked.

"Have you ever played Jenga?"

Even more confused Riven responded, "Yeah? But what does that have to do with this?"

"Well…our goal is to stack as may objects on top of Syndra as we can without waking her up. Kind of like reverse Jenga, but with a person."

"It is nothing like Jenga Irelia…and doesn't this seem kind of mean?" Riven asked.

"With all the flirting I had to deal with last night, I deserve a bit of fun!" Irelia responded while starting to put spoons onto Syndra's floating body, increasing the size of her pile.

"Irelia you're drunk. Go back to bed."

"I'm not drunk, I'm sleep deprived!"

"Right now, I'm not sure if there is a difference. Please, just go back to sleep. I know I am."

Another 10 minutes went by of Irelia stacking objects on top of Syndra, who miraculously didn't wake up. However she did roll over in her sleep, causing all of Irelia's random objects to fall to the floor. After seeing this, a defeated Irelia finally went back to sleep.

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Syndra rotated herself as she heard the sound of blankets moving near her, _too early…_ she thought to herself. She didn't know what time it was, but it sure wasn't time for her to get up. Soon afterwards there was the short sound of footsteps, after hearing this Syndra pulled her pillow around her ears.

_Why is someone moving?_

For a second or two there was silence, which allowed Syndra to relax for a moment, hoping that she would be able to fall back asleep.

"AAAHHHH!" Syndra yelled as bright sunlight filled the room and she fell down towards the mattress on the floor beneath her, landing on her stomach. "Ugh…" she groaned as she turned on to her back and simultaneously tried to rub her eyes while she blocked out the suns piercing light.

Syndra heard more footsteps as they grew closer to her, "Why were you floating in your slept?" the voice asked.

Sitting up, Syndra tried to focus herself, though she failed as all the blood rushed from her head and instead she grew dizzy. She sat there for a minute trying to collect herself, _where am I again? And why am I surrounded by all this stuff?_


	13. Riven the Pack-Mule

"Ah, crud. We're going to need to go shopping." She said, begrudging admitting defeat. "Where would we even get clothes for camping around here anyway?"

Riven shrugged her shoulders, "Shopping isn't really my thing, I always end up as a pack-mule."

"Pack-mule?" Syndra questioned

"Yeah, back in Noxus I used to get dragged around shopping with a close friend of mine…" Riven trailed off as she described her past experiences with shopping.

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_"Why are you dragging me around town with you again?" Riven questioned as she followed her friend around. The woman walking next to her was a little bit shorter than her, with long red hair, wearing an outfit that Riven wasn't sure was more leather or bare skin, and most likely more daggers than she could ever imagine hidden on her person._

_"I just thought that you would enjoy a day out on the town that's all." Katarina replied._

_"Uh huh, yeah of course. What's the real reason?" Riven said skeptically._

_"Don't worry, you will find out soon enough." Katarina chuckled._

_After a few minutes of walking they made their way into a shopping mall in one of the richer districts of Noxus. If she hadn't been with Katarina, Riven doubted that she ever would come here, with her being just a soldier. Most of the stuff here was way out of Riven's price range, but apparently not for Kat._

_As they made their way into the first store, Katarina immediately went over to the store's dagger collection near the counter._

_"Ah, Ms_._ Du Couteau a pleasure to see you as always." The clerk commented._

_Katarina didn't pay any attention to the clerk as she looked at the wares. Once she was done with the ones at the counter she went to some other daggers on display around the store. She picked a few up and tried swinging them around testing their weight. After a few minutes of this, a few thrown daggers into the wall, and a very nervous clerk they decided to leave and move onto the next store. As they left Riven went up to the counter and dropped a few coins in front of the nervous clerk and went on their way._

_"You're no fun." Kat pouted as they made their way to the next store. Passing many people, other stores in the side of the building, and various decorations along the way._

_Riven sighed, "Your father asked me to keep you out of trouble, the least I could do is make sure you don't get arrested for robbery." As Riven scanned Kat over once again she questioned, "Where do you even hide those things anyway?"_

_Kat started taking daggers that she had stolen from the store out of various pouches on her person, and places that Riven didn't even know you could hide daggers, and put them into a small, yet thick bag. Once Riven assumed that she had emptied all of the daggers out of her person, Kat took the bag and put it on Riven's shoulder like a purse._

_Riven looked down at the purse and sighed, reassuring herself of why she was there, "I hate you, you know I don't like being a pack-mule for your shopping trips."_

_Kat giggled, "I hate you too." Before giving her a kiss on the cheek, laughing as she made her way into another store._

_Riven pulled out the large coin purse Mr. Du Couteau had given her, looking at the large amount of change she had left in it and then towards her arms, knowing that by the end of the day one of these things was going to be empty and the other full._


	14. Chocolate Vault

**A/N: Sorry about the wait for this chapter, college really made it hard to get the actual story chapter up, let alone work on the Omake. Back to some Syndra and Irelia Omake action, hopefully I will have chapter 15's Omake up before the weekend, but no promises.**

* * *

"Making sure that the garden is tended, and that none of the food goes to waste mostly."

"That is nice of you—" Irelia started

Syndra interrupted an annoyed expression on her face, "That jerk stole all my chocolate didn't he!"

"Now, now, I'm sure he didn't take your sweets Syndra." Irelia tried to comfort Syndra.

Yuri tapped her finger to the side of her head, clearly in thought for a moment, "He took them…I think three, no four days ago?"

"What?" Irelia said extremely confused.

Syndra grabbed Yuri's shoulders, shaking her, "Did he find the vault!"

"Vault? I don't believe so, I haven't heard of such a thing." Yuri responded, confused.

Syndra rushed off into her fortress, floating her way towards the center. Irelia was close behind her, most likely curious and confused at Syndra's statement. As she entered the library she made her way towards a bookshelf in the corner. She pulled on the book farthest to the right on a head level shelf, releasing a locking mechanism and pushing on the door opening up a pathway. As she made her way down the dark passage, lights flickered on, lighting up the passage that spiraled its way down into the center of her fortress. As she made to the bottom she walked her way to the center of a square room. The room was made of the same stone that her fortress was constructed of, in the four corners of the room were pillars holding the room up and in front of Syndra was a vault.

A few seconds behind Syndra was Irelia, who was taken aback by the room, "What is this place?"

Ignoring her Syndra walked over to the vault, putting her hands on it she poured her magic into it. She could feel the locking mechanisms unlocking from behind the vault door. After a few seconds the door let out a loud creaking noise, slowly the door began to move off to the side. As the door opened a chill filled the air.

"Whoa. What is this?" Irelia asked as she peered into the darkness of the vault that had opened up before Syndra.

"This…" Syndra said as she walked into the vault, "is my stash." After walking through the door, Syndra flipped on a light switch revealing a room packed full of chocolate. The room was almost complete filled, and had piles stacked up towards the ceiling in neat columns of chocolate. The room itself was about the size of her courtyard, and twice as tall as herself. "I have been keeping this stash hidden away from Zed for years now. If he found it, I imagine he would want to use it in some cooking recipe."

Syndra turned around to face Irelia, expecting her to in awe of her massive chocolate stash.

"Where did you even get all of this chocolate, how many different types are there, and why do you have it?" Irelia questioned as she walked around the room, observing the various different types of chocolate.

"Why? Because I can, I like to think of myself as a chocolate connoisseur. If there is a type of chocolate on Ionia that I haven't tried yet, I will find it and I will add it to my collection!"

Suddenly Irelia perked up like she just made a realization, "Is this why you hang around Zed? So you can use him and his ninja's to acquire various types of chocolate?"

"Maaaaybeeeeee."


	15. Night Shift

**A/N: Annnnddd the omakes are back! Sorry about the long break, summer classes and all that fun stuff.**

* * *

Zed stalked his way around the outskirts of the Placidium, staying on the tops of buildings when he could to avoid the small number of people walking around. Considering that it was the dead of night, there were very few people out aside from some guards. Finally he made his move. Jumping down, he ran into the 24 Hour convenience store and headed straight for the baking aisle. The door rang out a belated chime. While searching for his target, the door chimed again

Shiina, the on duty cashier, watched in fascination as Shen, the Eye of Twilight, prowled through the store, seemingly also searching for something. The man who came in before Shen seemed frustrated by his inability to find his object. Shen then walked down the baking aisle. Their eyes met in a cold dead stare. Shiina was certain that something was about to happen so she reached under the counter and grasped a metal object. When she pressed down on it, it rang out with a satisfying *click*

Both of the men suddenly broke their gaze and grasped an item off the shelf, exclaiming a unison "Ah ha!" Though their faces were covered in masks, Shiina could tell that there was a grin growing on both men's faces, creating an odd reflection of each other.

_Brothers perhaps? _Shiina thought to herself.

The man and Shen held their grips tight. In the first man's hand was a pack of milk chocolate, and in Shen's was a bag of white chocolate. Reflecting each other again, both men grabbed the bags and held them up to their face, giving it a nuzzle of affection.

Shiina put her weapon away and leaned on the counter as the two men began shopping in earnest, both picking out baking supplies that only slightly differed. With each new item the men gave each other heated glares as if to say 'How dare you like that trash!'

_Great, just what I need right now, two overpowered brothers fighting over baking ingredients. What a pair of idiots._

A few minutes later the men walked up to the counter placed their supplies on the counter top. As they were placing their supplies onto the counter each would give the other a glare or make some sort of off handed remark about the others choice on ingredient.

"Peanut oil? Only amateurs bake with peanut oil." Zed remarked.

"I can't believe a 'professional' chef like you is using something as common as Canola oil. Ugh...is that milk chocolate you are using?"

"Only the best, unlike that white chocolate you have there."

Shinna butted in, "Are you guys ever going to pay? I have other customers to tend to."

The two men looked behind them, only now noticing a line of other customers with baskets full of miscellaneous items waiting to check out. In unison they reached into their uniforms and grabbed a handful of coins exceeding their total bills, smacked them onto the counter, and hastily walked out while continuing to make remarks about the other's choice of ingredients.

Shiina sighed again, _I'm never trading shifts again, night shift has all the crazies._


	16. Birth of Insanity

**A/N: Hope you guys enjoy, this chapter was pretty fun to write. (Also midnightfluff and I came up with this Omake concept long ago and have been waiting forever for the right chapter to use it on.)**

* * *

"I see the rumors that your shadow's sarcasm has worn off on you are true. Your immaturity hasn't changed a bit either."

"As if that shadow could change me."

"Uh huh. So where is your shadow anyway? Shouldn't it be...you know...following you around or something?"

"He doesn't know I'm here, he's off doing...shadow things."

"How does he not know you're here? Isn't he the source of your magic? Shouldn't you using it let him know where you are?"

"I made sure a long time ago that he would stop paying attention to my use of his magic.

* * *

**A few years ago**

_**Ah, I can feel the use of my magic. I wonder what horrible deeds my new host is committing with it. Let's go figure it out, maybe we will share an evil laugh or two together.**_

The shadow manifested itself in the corner of the room. As the shadow walked into the room it noticed that Zed crouching on the ground.

_**Oooooo, did he kill someone?**_

As the shadow approached Zed stood up and turned around. Though instead of the blades that Zed was expecting he was wearing mittens instead, and instead of blood there was a tray of baked goods in his hand.

"_**What...is that?"**_

"Oh, I almost forgot about my cookies so I used a shadow portal to grab some mittens and get them out of the oven so they wouldn't burn. Don't they look delicious!"

"_**Argh….this is thousand year old dark magic. It is supposed to be used for evil, not baking cookies."**_

"Seemed to work out pretty well for me...And they are scones!

* * *

The shadow stood in the corner of the room as Zed was listening to one of his subordinates prattle on about some problem that the order was facing. The shadow wasn't quite sure, he lost interest long ago. Suddenly Zed summoned a portal to his side and stuck his arm into, the subordinate stumbled a bit, but otherwise continued.

_**Mhm, where is it going to open up at. Will it be under the subordinates feet? Is he going grab him from behind? What's he going to do?**_

The shadow got his answer a few moments later when the portal opened up behind Zed. The shadow tilted his head slightly in confusion. His confusion quickly turned to disappointment when Zed's arm reached out of the portal and….scratched what appeared to be an itch on Zed's back.

_**Ugh….of all the people that I could get stuck with. It has to be THIS guy who has a million and one ways to misuse my powers.**_

* * *

"_**Hear me out, I've got a great idea for an evil plan to take over the world."**_

"No." Zed said as he walked out of his bathroom and into his bedroom, wearing nothing but a bathrobe around his waist.

"_**What do you mean 'no'?"**_

"I don't have any interest in taking over the world right now. I just want to lead a simple life as a professional ninja slash baker."

"_**What is wrong with you? I thought you wanted more power to take over Ionia or something?"**_

"No, I just wanted to beat Shen. I did that so I am content for now."

"_**Then why did you open the box!?"**_

"I said I wanted to beat Shen, and I did that." Zed said as he walked over to his closet and opened up a shadow portal on the door. Zed walked through the shadow portal and emerged a moment later with two outfits. "Do you think I should wear my standard red outfit or my shiny new white one? I like the nostalgia that the red one brings, but the white one really highlights my well toned abs, trimmed waist, and well defined glutes of steel."

"_**Ugh…...did you really just use a portal to walk through a FREAKING door. Not even a locked door either! Just your closet door."**_

"Yeah, why?"

"_**Arghhhh! You humans are so so I don't even have words! I don't know how long I am going to be able to put up with this. How long do you humans live, 50 years?"**_

"Ehh, typically about 80 to 100."

"_**Oh god it's longer than I thought!"**_

* * *

"And that is how I stopped the shadow from keeping tabs on me." Zed said proudly while shaking his head in agreement with himself.

Shen clapped his hands slowly. "Good work, you managed to make an ancient evil being insane. I really hope that doesn't have any sort of negative consequences."


	17. Play Time at the Park

"I still remember the golden glow it had like yesterday. It was the same color as the sun."

_**Syndra, Auntie loves your magic! It's like the sunrise!**_

Syndra's memory continued;

"Awe, your hands are so pretty when they glow like that!"

Syndra giggled.

"Can you wave your hands around make pretty shapes in the air with them?"

Syndra nodded as she began to draw triangles, squares, and circles in the air in front of her, her magic leaving a golden trail behind her hands.

Auntie clapped her hands in encouragement and congratulated her with each completed shape. Auntie picked her up onto her lap and began to tickle Syndra, she began to flail her hands in the air as she giggled. Shortly after there was a loud boom that made Auntie and her jump.

Syndra tugged at her Auntie's sleeve as she looked back behind her at something Syndra couldn't see, "Auntie, what's wrong?"

"Syndra? What happens when your hands glow?"

"Oh! Oh! Oh! It's so cool Auntie! I can lift things!" Syndra exclaimed. "Auntie? Why'd you get so quiet? Is something wrong!? Auntie!?"

Auntie put Syndra down on the ground and kneeled down in front of her, "If Mommy asks what we did today, we went out for ice cream. Okay?"

Syndra looked confused at Auntie, "But we didn't go out for…"

"We are going out for ice cream!"

"Yay!" Syndra squealed as she started to drag Auntie towards the ice cream shop. "Hey Auntie?"

"Yes, Syndra?"

"Why's the playground upside down?"

"Ice cream Syndra! Just focus on the ice cream!"


	18. Tea Time

**A/N: Sorry about the delay on this Omake. (17 was done last week just needed a bit of a touch up) Midnightfluff and I spent a long time trying to come up with a funny Omake for this, but due to the nature of the chapter the first few iterations were scrapped because they ended up being depressing.**

* * *

Irelia watched as Lee Sin prepared a cup of tea for each of them.

"So what made you take her in?" Irelia asked. "From what you told me, a lot of your fellow monks wanted to get rid of her once they learned that she was the Dark Sovereign. It would have been a lot easier to ask her to leave."

"Syndra's just a very misunderstood child."

"Misunderstood? Why do I feel like that isn't very accurate?"

"Of course it is! Give me something Syndra has done and I will prove it to you!"

"Umm...okay. How about when she destroyed a bunch of shops in Fai-Don?"

"Supply shopping. Clearly they tried to rip her off and she wasn't having it."

"That doesn't quite excuse the destruction though…"

"Would they not try to rip off other customers as well then? If you ask me she was doing the city a service." Lee Sin said as he nodded his head in approval, shortly after he took another sip of his tea.

"Ugh….Okay, fine. How about when she destroyed the army trying to capture her for the crime of killing her mentor?"

"I don't know Irelia...What do you do when a random army shows up and tries to take your home from you? Hmmm…?"

"What are you insinuating?"

"Noxus. They invaded your home and you helped fight them off. Soldiers invaded Syndra's home and she did the same. By herself!"

"This is way too serious of a topic for tea. How about we agree to disagree on this one?"

"Agreed, but just so you know I am taking this as a win." Lee Sin said with a grin on his face.


	19. If the Author Was Really Lazy

Syndra reached up and got ahold of Irelia's shirt and pulled her down. She didn't stop until she felt Irelia's soft lips press up against her own. Even then she didn't immediately loosen her grip. This was a moment that Syndra was going to remember for a long time.

A few moments later Irelia pulled away.

"Sorry, I'm not into girls"

**The End**

* * *

**A/N: See Chatper 20 for the actual answer.**

**Credit for this chapter goes to Midnightfluff. Hooray for dark humor!**


	20. Flirting with Disaster

Riven laid back and sighed in relief as Irelia left her room.

_That went better than expected. I'm glad she doesn't know the truth about Syndra trying to sabotage that guy hitting on her._

* * *

"Syndra, what are you doing?"

Syndra jumped, but let out a sigh when she realized that is was Riven. After that she merely pointed around the corner of the building.

Riven moved up next to Syndra and looked around the corner. After a moment of looking she saw Irelia sitting down drinking tea.

"What am I looking at? Irelia drinking tea is hardly out of the ordinary." Riven asked. A moment later someone walked up to Irelia. "Who's that?"

"I don't know, they've been talking for a little while now. That guy went away for a little bit, but then he came back"

"Hmm….wait. Do you think he is trying to flirt with her?" Riven asked.

"Pfft. Good luck with that. I doubt she would even notice if he was." Syndra scoffed.

"I don't know. Maybe she was really sheltered as a child and doesn't realize that not everyone is straight."

"I'm not saying that I don't believe you, but I am mentally denying everything you just said."

Riven could see Syndra tense up a bit when Irelia laughed at something that the mysterious man said.

After a few moments of watching them talk Syndra grunted. "Well, maybe I should just mess with him then, even out the odds a little bit." Syndra then reached out her hand towards the two.

Riven reached her hand out and lowered Syndra's hand.

"Don't." Riven said.

Syndra looked at her with a perturbed expression on her face.

"If Irelia actually is straight, then nothing you do will make a difference in the end. And if Irelia did find out that you were messing with her love life, then your chances of getting with Irelia are low."

"Fine." Syndra said curtly. Then she went back to watching nervously.

After that the mysterious man made a motion towards the residential area down the street.

_Oh snap, is he asking her back to his house? I wonder if Syndra…_

Riven's thoughts were interrupted when she heard a crack on the side of the building. When she looked the side of the building was mangled from Syndra's magic.

_Yeah, she caught that._

Irelia merely shook her head and motioned towards the inn that they were staying at.

Riven sighed, _at least she is as oblivious as ever._

"I'm going to go over there and see if I can't help Irelia out."

"Good."

With that Riven walked over to where Irelia was with the supplies that was sent out to get. When she got next to her she put her hand on her shoulder as she laid the supplies in Irelia's lap.

"Oh, hey Riven!" Irelia exclaimed. "I was getting worried, you and Syndra had been gone for a while."

"Sorry about that, I got distracted helping Syndra. She should be back shortly. So who is your friend here?"

"Oh right I forgot!" Irelia then turned her attention to the mysterious man.

In that time when Irelia wasn't looking Riven mouthed 'Back off' to the man.

"How rude of me! His name is Timeo. He works down the street. He was kind enough to offer us a place to stay the night, but I was just telling him we already had a room here for the night."

_Some how I don't think that offer applied to all of us. _A shudder went down Riven's spine at the follow up thoughts that unfortunately invaded her mind. The man seemed nervous now, and was probably looking for an excuse to leave without seeming rude. Riven wanted to make sure that her message was clear, so she wanted to do one more thing, but she wasn't sure what to do.

_Crap...what did Kat used to do to scare guys away? _A few moments later the answer came to Riven.

She took a seat down next to Irelia, picked up her sword, and in the most intimidating and obvious way possible she started to sharpen her sword with a whetstone. Riven's motions were long and exaggerated, in reality she was worried that she might hurt her sword but hopefully she wouldn't have to do it for long.

"I know that you insist that we stay at your place, I'm sure it is very lovely. But we are already settled in here, so I'm afraid that I must decline your offer."

Her plan ended up working and shortly after the man excused himself and quickly scurried away.

Riven sighed to herself in relief when we went in the opposite direction of Syndra.


	21. Every Man For Himself

**A/N:** **Long overdue omake chapter. This was one of those chapters that we had no clue what to do for the Omake, then I made a comment about what we could do, and midnightfluff just went to town with it.**

* * *

Shen flinched like he had been hit for a brief moment, "Zed is hanging out with a girl?"

Karma blinked for a moment, confused at his random question. "Y-yes? Why is that so odd? Surely there are females in the Order of Shadows?

"Yes, you see, we found out early on the Zed had a… special set of skills far beyond those of the ordinary shinobi."

"Really? What was it?"

"Zed has this innate ability to piss off a female in 10 words or less. It was terrifying to watch. He barely had to glance at a woman before he knew exactly what to say to anger her beyond reason. The fact that any woman has lasted long enough to be in ANY kind of relationship with him is astounding."

"Wow, is it just with women or can he do it with men as well?"

"He can do it with men but it usually take a little longer to anger them."

"Really?"

Yeah, about five minutes in his presence just about does any man in."

"How does he get anything done then if he continuously angers them?"

"Mostly through intimidation and brief commands."

"Pardon me if this is too personal but..how does he have an...intimate relationship with a woman if this is how he is?"

Shen bursts out laughing, "Zed having a REAL relationship with a woman!? That's hilarious! No, Zed doesn't do that, though now thinking back I'm not sure if it's by choice or because of his...skill."

"What about with a man?"

"Nope. As far as I'm aware, Zed has only tried dating once and that didn't turn out well for him, his girlfriend, or poor Kennen."

"Kennen?"

"Yeah, after Zed and Akali broke up, Kennen ended up as Akali's dress up doll. They only dated for a week, but with the way Akali acts you'd figure it was a lot longer. I'm not sure how she ended up dressing Kennen up though…"

"I...I see. And you did nothing to help him?"

"Do you know what's worse than a yordle being dressed up? A tall, muscular man such as myself being dressed up. It's every man for himself in that house."

"I did not need that image."

"No...no you didn't. Be grateful that it shall not become a reality as long as Kennen is sacrificed."


	22. I Quit

**A/N: Rapid fire uploads! Thank midnightfluff for that.**

* * *

Irelia seemed to fidget in her seat, uncomfortably.

"Well...It seems that Syndra actually is kind of in love with me. I'm not sure if it's love or not, or if I've been reciprocating it. I don't even know how I feel on the matter, I mean she's not that bad. I know that you need these reports, but I feel like if I keep doing it any longer that it's going to damage our relationship, and I don't want to lose her as friend. Girlfriend. I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE!" At some point Irelia had jumped out of her chair, and was now grasping the edge of Karma's desk as she was heaving heavily from her rant.

Karma, taken aback, now remembered The Dark Sovereign's parting message.

_The house. As in The Dark Sovereign and Irelia, Captain of the Guard, LIVING together. In the same house. Together….Together...Together.._

"That's it I'm done. "

"Huh?"

"I'm not putting up with this crazy anymore, Irelia YOU get my job now. I'm going on vacation. Don't bother stopping me, I'll see you when the world makes sense again and I don't have to deal with mountains of paperwork… so maybe summer? Probably not."

Karma jumps from her desk and begins to gather her personal items into a bag. As soon as she's done she leaves her office, with a dazed Irelia still in her seat.

"What just happened? I think that means I'm an elder now." Irelia sat in silence for a minute before her words sunk in. "...Ah crap what am I going to tell Syndra!?"


	23. Secretary Wars

**A/N: This is the adult form of Pokemon or Yugioh. It makes just as much sense! Also Jun really doesn't like Mathers, not quite sure why, but they are rivals.**

* * *

"You are distracted Captain." Jun said while slowly standing up. After pushing the chair back in, Jun commented, "I'll return shortly once I have collected some light reading for you."

Jun then left Captain Lito's office and made a right down the hallway. After walking for a few minutes the Office of Justice was in sight. Upon entering the hall and immediately making a left, Jun stopped in front of a certain person's desk. Jun quietly greeted the person behind the desk.

"Mathers."

Upon hearing his name, Mathers looked up and swore underneath his breath.

"Jun."

"You know why I am here Mathers."

"Then you should already know my answer Jun, you can't have it."

"Yet every time I come here, I am the victor."

"That is simply because you don't fight fair!" Mathers responded tersely.

"I just use the resources at my disposal, which apparently are better than yours."

"Well not today. Your reign of tyranny ends now!"

"We shall see…" Jun quickly slammed a form down on to Mathers' desk.

"Form 876-Q9, your usual opening move. Well I finally have a counter! Take this! 9721-AG!"

Jun stared down slightly surprised, "Huh, I see you're finally doing your research. Good thing I always come prepared. Form GETB-76"

"What! What is this!?"

"Form GETB-76 is handy little form that allows me to deny your denial."

"What, how?"

"Simple, I am using my authority on behalf of the Captain of Guard."

"But, but. That's not fair! There is no way I can get my superiors to sign a counterform!"

"Well," Jun said while casually dismissing Mathers and gathering up the requested paperwork. "That is not my problem now is it? Same time next week Mathers?"

"Curse you Jun! I will have my revenge!"


	24. Being sent to the Duchess' office

**A/N: Accidentally skipped Chapter 24's omake, but this one was fresh in our heads so we did this one real quick.**

**This is the missing scene from Irelia and Karma's...meeting.**

* * *

Irelia walked into Karma's office.

"So you are here again." Karma droned.

"Yes."

"For pretty much the same reason."

"Yes."

"Except somehow, it's worse this time."

"I know."

"You told me she would be on her best behavior inside the Placidium."

"She's trying! It took her a whole month this time!" Irelia defended.

"THAT'S. NOT. THE. POINT!" Karma yelled.

"Well what do you want me to do about!? She was with Shen, he left her in the middle of a hospital! How is that my fault!"

"She followed you home, and you refused to get rid of her, she is your responsibility!"

"What was I supposed to do? I can't just kick her out on the street!"

"You should have taken her back to where you found her!"

"SHE'S NOT A PET!" Irelia yelled, then she changed her tone to a mumble. "Besides I found her in the Placidium."

"Well I want her out of the Placidium!"

"I want her in!"

"Why!?"

"HAVE YOU SEEN HER BOOBS!?"

"...NO! AND I DIDN'T NEED TO HEAR THAT!"

"This is all Shen's fault!"

"I agree!"

"Then why are we yelling!"

"I don't know!" Karma before resting her head in her hands, "Just babysit their meetings from now on, and make sure she doesn't blow up anything else. This is getting REALLY hard to explain to people."

"Okay! Wait what…"


End file.
